


Fake you out

by HeavyDirtySoulIsHoldingOnToYou



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-01
Updated: 2017-04-07
Packaged: 2018-10-13 18:39:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10519539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeavyDirtySoulIsHoldingOnToYou/pseuds/HeavyDirtySoulIsHoldingOnToYou
Summary: Tyler pretending to be okay when he isn't.Ch. 1 his familyCh. 2 his friendsCh. 3 Josh





	1. Chapter 1

Tyler curled up in his bed, trying desperately to muffle the sobs escaping his mouth as the tears streamed down his face. All he wanted to do for the whole day was stay hidden in his bed with Josh curled around him and away from everyone.

Tyler had known from the moment he had woken up that it was going to be one of his bad days. He had felt like there was a crushing weight laying on his chest and it was making it difficult for him to breathe. All he wanted to do was scream until everything stopped. It took a moment but he then noticed the moisture that was slipping down his cheeks and when he raised a hand to wipe it away he realised that it was tears.

As soon as he opened his mouth painful sobs began to escape and he quickly buried his face in his pillow in an attempt to muffle the sound. Tyler had learned to not try to stop the crying because it made the weight laying on his chest feel a small amount lighter. Tyler didn’t know how long he had been there crying when he heard a knock on his bedroom door. He tried desperately to calm the broken sobs so that nobody would hear.

“Tyler breakfast is ready.” He heard his mom say before the sound of her footsteps as she walked away.

It was a while before he felt he was finally able to drag himself out of his bed. He walked to his wardrobe and pulled out the first thing his hand touched and got dressed. Tyler then left his bedroom and made his way towards the bathroom and after using the toilet he washed his hands, leaning heavily against the sink as he looked at the mirror.

His red blotchy face was reflected back at him, tear marks going down his cheeks and creases from his pillow lining his face. He cupped water in his hands and leaned over to splash the cool water in his face, hoping to disguise the evidence of tears from his family.

Tyler straightened up to check his appearance in the mirror. His eyes were red and slightly swollen from the tears but it wasn’t too obvious that he had been crying, the only way you would be able to tell was if you were paying attention.

‘ _No risk of that happening.’_ Tyler thought to himself before sighing and reaching over for a towel to dry his face.

After throwing one last look at the mirror he left the bathroom and made his way downstairs to join his family for breakfast. He could feel the pressure building up inside of him again the closer he got to his family.

As he reached the last step on the stairs Tyler stood up straight from his slumped position, squared his shoulders and forced a smile on his face before making his way towards the dinning room where his family had already began to eat their breakfast, while his parents were asking about their school lives.

‘ _Oh don’t wait for me or anything. It’s not like we’ve had to wait if it was Zack or Dad or anyone else right?’_ Tyler thought snidely as he pulled a seat out at the table and brought everyone's attention to him.

All of his family lowered their eyes back down to their plates except from Zack, who was eyeing Tyler in concern as he sat down in the chair next to him.

Tyler picked at his breakfast not feeling hungry and wishing he was anywhere else while trying to ignore the heavy gaze of his brother boring into the side of his face.

“Are you okay?” He heard Zack whisper as he pushed his food around his plate to avoid eating it.

The pressure just kept building higher and higher till all he wanted to do was scream that he wasn’t okay. But Tyler just turned to look at his brother and smiled, hoping it looked convincing and not as fake as it felt as it stretched across his face.

“I’m okay. Why wouldn’t I be?” He asked, tilting his head to the side and furrow his eyebrows in an attempt to feign confusion.

It must have been convincing as after eyeing Tyler’s face for a few more moments Zack smiled back and turned back to his food and began to eat enthusiastically.

Tyler turned back to his own food, holding back a sigh as he began to slowly eat. After everyone was finished they were allowed to leave the table and he could feel his shoulder’s slump in relief at the fact that he is getting a break from acting like he was fine when all he wanted to do was scream.

He walked towards the front door, put on his shoes before leaving his house behind and thinking about where to go. He began making his way towards Josh’s house when he remembered that he was working that day, he then changed his destination to the forest. Once there he followed the familiar path through the trees and after walking for around ten minutes he found himself inside a clearing.

Tyler made his way towards the middle of the clearing and collapsed into a heap. He then threw he head back and  released the pressure off his chest by **S C R E A M I N G.**

He didn’t know how long he had been screaming for but by the time he stopped his throat was hurting and his voice was hoarse, but he finally felt like he could make it through the rest of the day without becoming insane.

As Tyler made his way back to his house all he could think was, ‘ _Why doesn’t my family notice? Why am I able to fake them out?’_

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**_Hi! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it! Comments are always appreciated! Stay alive frens |-/_ **


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler pretends to be okay in front of his 'friends'.

This wasn’t how Tyler was expecting his day to go. He had actually woken up in a decent mood that lasted through most of the day. He was laughing, joking around with his friends from the basketball team instead of pretending for once and he actually managed to focus during lessons for once without his thoughts overwhelming him.

Then Lunch happened.

Tyler had gone to the music classroom to play with piano. He had really wanted to play all day and he knew that the room wasn’t being used plus the door was never locked during school hours.

So there he was sitting at the piano playing Blasphemy.

**_“Here I come, come to you in the very clothes_ **

**_That I killed, killed you in and now I know I'm alone_ **

**_I walk to you, rain falls from you_ **

**_Can you wash me, can you drown me?”_ **

Tyler then took in a deep breath and closed his eyes as he continued to play.

**_I wanna be a lot of things, so much pent up inside of me_ **

**_I wanna be stronger, too long I've sat here undecidedly_ **

**_Planning strategy, half of me knows it's all just a fallacy_ **

**_Failing miserably, drastically and then I crash dramatically_ **

**_Into a wall I've hit a hundred times before_ **

**_And yet I still ignore the dark red blood stains on the floor_ **

**_And I'm back in front of you, Lord, with the blood on the floor_ **

**_Is the blood mine or yours? Don't wanna do this anymore_ **

**_Back and forth between being me and who you call me to be_ **

**_You see a man free who thinks he has to buy a key_ **

**_To a door but he can't 'cause he's poor and he can't_ **

**_Fall down anymore 'cause he's already on the floor_ **

**_And his heart is broken and all and this is his call_ **

**_But it's more of a cry 'cause he will try nine times_ **

**_To realize nine crimes but he has more than nine lives_ **

**_So he picks himself up and keeps climbing for the prize again_ **

**_Here I come again to you_ **

**_Just to show that blood soaked through_ **

**_Through my bones and all I own_ **

**_Is there a way for me to grow?_ **

**_I walk to you, rain falls from you_ **

**_Can you wash me, can you drown me, please?_ **

**_Every time I feel selfish ambition is taking my vision_ **

**_My crime is my sentence, repentance is taking commission_ **

**_It's taking a toll on my soul, I'm screaming submission and_ **

**_I don't know if I am dying or living_ **

**_'Cause I will save a face for name's sake_ **

**_Abuse grace, take a aim to obtain a new name in a newer place_ **

**_But my name is lame, I can't walk and I ain't the same_ **

**_And my name became a new destiny to the grave and_ **

**_They say the ocean's blue, but it's black right now_ **

**_In the dark, on the sand, looking out at my crowd_ **

**_Depression and drowning singing now the full parts_ **

**_Of lightning reveals where the ocean stops and the sky starts_ **

**_I've been told by the sky that the ocean I shall win_ **

**_But it's hard for me to see where ocean stops and sky begins_ **

**_A random strikes of light remind me of what is true_ **

**_But right now the ocean's blacker than black, the sky is too”_ **

Tyler sighed as he took his eyes from the piano and he finally opened his eyes. As he did it was then he noticed the silhouette of a person standing in the doorway. His eyes widened before he grabbed his bag and ran out of the room, keeping his eyes to the ground as he passed but he could still see them out of the corner of his eye. It was the music teacher and he was still watching Tyler as he rushed passed. He could still feel the eyes on him as he rushed down the corridor.

‘ _ How much did he hear? What if he wants to talk to me about it? What if he mentions it to someone?’ _ These thoughts kept pounding against his skull as he continued to get as far away from the room as he could as fast as possible.

Tyler ran down the empty corridors not paying any attention where he was going. In the back of his mind he was thankful that there was no one in the corridor to see him.

The next thing he knows he is standing inside of the toilets, after making sure all the stalls were empty he opened the door for the disabled stall and leaned back against the door, panting heavily. 

It was then Tyler realised that he was breathing too fast, his heart was pounding and he was beginning to feel lightheaded and dizzy. He focused on slowing his breathing down and he after around five minutes and his heart finally calmed down as well. 

It was when he rested his face in his hands that there had been tears leaking out of his eyes. He didn’t know how long he had been crying but he hoped that he hadn’t started in the music room where the teacher would have seen him. 

After listening to make sure the toilets were still empty he left the stall and went over to the sinks. He turned on the cold water and cupped some in his hands before splashing some in his face, hoping that it would make it look like he wasn’t crying. He wiped the water of his face with the sleeve of his hoody and leaned against the sinks heavily, his head hanging forward as he sighed.

He then got his phone to check the time. There was still fifteen minutes left of lunch so he decided to meet his friends, hoping that they would help distract him from the pressure he could feel building up in his chest and the weight that made his shoulders feel like he was being dragged down to the ground.

After making his way to the cafeteria he spotted his friends straight away. They were all acting rowdy as usual, yelling and pushing each other around. The sight of them made him feel worse instead of better like he was hoping, so Tyler turned around and was about to leave when he heard his name being shouted across the room.

“Tyler! C’mon man!”

Tyler couldn’t tell who had shouted his name but at that moment he hated them, as everyone was staring at him and the weight of their gazes were making the pressure in his chest build up and the weight on his shoulders feel even heavier.

‘ _ I wish Josh went to the same school. Or even Brendon or Patrick or Pete or anyone. If they did I could sit with them instead of with people who I only call my friends because we’re on the same team.’  _ Tyler thought to himself as he forced a smile on his face as he made his way towards the table where they were all sitting.

He sat down on the edge of the table not saying anything. He didn’t say anything for the rest of lunch, only occasionally laughing at a joke or nodding his head, trying to blend into the background.

It worked. No one turned to talk to him and he didn’t talk to anyone. It was just Tyler and his thoughts with no one to help him.

‘ _ I just want this day to end already. I want to go home and hide from everyone.’ _ Tyler thought as he dragged himself away from the table and made his way to his next class. ‘ _ It’s going to be a long day.’ _ Tyler internally sighed as one of the guys wrapped their arm around his shoulders and shook him, smiling at him obviously having told a joke that he hadn’t heard. 

**He faked a smile brittle back, hoping it looked realer than it felt. It must have been because he was then left alone to fall into the background. **

* * *

**Hi! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it! Comments are always appreciated! Stay alive frens |-/**

 


	3. Chapter 3

Tyler was once again curled up in his bed, trying to choke back his tears but broken sobs were still managing to escape. He had a fight with his parents about his grades, when he had tried to explain that he had a hard time concentrating in class but his dad just screamed at him. 

“YOU NEED TO STOP BEING SO LAZY! ALL YOU DO IS HIDE IN YOUR ROOM! WE FEED YOU AND KEEP A ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD, THE ONLY THING WE ASKED YOU TO DO IS DO WELL IN SCHOOL AND YOU CAN’T EVEN GET THAT RIGHT! YOU’RE PATHETIC AND A WASTE OF SPACE!” 

His father’s face was nearly purple with his rage at that point and that was when Tyler ran to his room while his mom calmed his father down.

Tyler was dragged out of the memory by the sound of his phone buzzing on the bedside table. He scrubbed his eyes with the sleeves of his hoodie before reaching over for his phone.

When he picked it up he saw that he had 5 texts for Josh.

**From Jish - 16:54pm**

**Hey Tyler wanna hang out?**

**From Jish - 17:10pm**

**Hey Ty are you okay?**

**From Jish - 17:30pm**

**Ty Guy come on please answer.**

**From Jish - 17:47pm**

**If you don’t answer in the next 5 minutes**

**I’m coming to your house.**

**From Jish - 17:53pm**

**I’m leaving my place now. See you in a few.**

Tyler smiled to himself as he read the text. Even if nobody else cared about him, he would always have Josh. 

He then checked the time and saw that it was now 18:00pm which meant that Josh would be arriving in a few minutes. He got out from under his blankets and ran to the bathroom to try and make it look like he hadn’t been crying by splashing water onto his face and he was actually successful. It didn’t look like he had been crying at all.

He rushed back to his room and lay down on his bed on top of his blankets, placing his hands behind his head and shutting his eyes.

It wasn’t long before he heard his bedroom window opening and the sound of footsteps nearing his bed. He then felt the mattress dip and Josh’s arm lay over his chest.

They both lay there in silence for around about 10 minutes before Tyler’s eyelids fluttered open and turned to look at Josh. 

Josh was already looking at him and when their gazes locked he smiled. 

“Hey.” Tyler whispered quietly.

“Hey.” Josh reached for Tyler’s hand and squeezed it gently. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah I’m fine. I was only sleeping.” Tyler answered, forcing a smile on his face was easier now that Josh was with him.

Josh sighed and closed his eyes for a moment before opening them again to look at Tyler. He opened his arms for Tyler to lay in and that was when Tyler broke.

Tyler flung himself into Josh arms and buried his face into Josh’s neck as the tears began to stream from his eyes. He didn’t talk and Josh didn’t force him. All Josh did was run a hand through Tyler’s hair and pressed kissed against his face.

It went on like this for over an hour before Tyler’s tears completely stopped. He rested his chin on Josh’s chest and looked up at his face.

“Thank you.” Tyler whispered.

“What for?” Josh questioned with a confused smile on his face.

“For being you.” Tyler answered, leaning down to press a soft kiss on his lips before cuddling into his chest.

‘ _ For seeing the truth. For seeing through my mask that nobody else seems to be able to.’ _

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**Hi! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed! I hope this turned out okay because I re-wrote it like five times and I'm still not happy with it. Stay alive frens |-/**

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